As far as career
skills go, negotiating is a useful one for the workplace. From snagging the
salary you want; to getting your first pick of project, being able to massage a
situation comes in handy. In Getting More:
How You Can Negotiate to Succeed in Work and Life, author and
negotiation expert Stuart Diamond shares the tips he teaches to his students at
The Wharton School and executives at the 200 Fortune 500 companies for which
he's consulted. His research on negotiation spans 20 years of research, was
conducted in 45 countries and used data from 30,000 people. Here are four of
his tips for never-fail negotiating:
Don't think about
"winning.” Negotiation is not a competition; it's collaboration.
Instead of winning, you should focus on meeting your goals. "If you think
of it as 'winning,' you will think about beating them. And if you do that, you
will not collaborate as much," says Diamond. Define your goals and ask
yourself if your actions are helping you meet them.
Ask what you can do
for them. Negotiation is a give and take, and asking how you
can help the other person can go a long way. "In order to get your needs
met, they have to feel, first, that you are willing to meet their needs. For
instance, when interviewing for a job or asking for a raise or promotion, ask
the company official what needs they want met," says Diamond. Then,
discuss how you might meet their needs -- and vice versa.
Uncover any misconceptions. Diamond says people often have a closer viewpoint than they think, and
an angry approach can prevent you both from seeing how close you really are.
Instead of expressing your distaste for their viewpoint, ask them to clarify
it. "Anytime you have a conflict with someone, ask what the parties are
perceiving, whether there is a mismatch and, if so, why. Also, knowing their
perceptions gives you a better starting point for persuasion, because you
understand the pictures in their heads," says Diamond.
Never threaten or walk
out. Ultimatums and walkouts make agreements a near
impossibility, says Diamond. His favorite example is the NBA lockout of the
past year. "The National Basketball Association wasted $800 million in a
shortened season when the parties refused to deal with each other in a
constructive negotiation setting, wasting precious time that could have been
used to get a deal." Keep your emotions in check or you'll be checking out
of your negotiation.
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